A Note from the Editor: Hello readers. Today we celebrate the one year anniversary of Anime Maru. When I closed my previous anime blog to pursue this concept, I wasn’t sure if it would be successful or not. After all, this is so different from anything I’ve done previously. But here we are, still regularly updating and with over 1 million views in our first year of operation.The entire staff would like to thank our readers for their incredible support. Thank you for appreciating anime with the same humor and silliness that we do. It is truly an honor for us to bring laughter and enjoyment to you.
WASHINGTON, DC – Celebrities, media personalities, and politicians gathered for a special gala honoring Anime Maru, the recipient of the 2015 Reporters Without Borders Excellence in Journalism Award. The award selection committee cited Anime Maru’s coverage of events both of geopolitical importance and relevance to the anime community. To celebrate this award, we at Anime Maru have decided to reflect upon the vast history that led us to receive it, and the various important stories we have been involved with over the past few decades.
January 1, 1963: Alongside the premiere of the first episode of Astro Boy, the first print issue of Anime Maru is published.
January 2, 1963: Anime Maru’s second issue is published, with top story “Why don’t they make good anime anymore?”
April 2, 1968: Anime Maru conducts the last interview with Speed Racer before his tragic death in a fiery car accident. This interview was conducted in the middle of the high speed car chase that led to his car accident.
July 21, 1969: Anime Maru sends a dakimakura into space, making Sally the Witch the first anime character on the moon. This would not be attempted again until the tragic Minmay Explosion Incident in 1986.
January 17, 1977: Anime Maru reports from inside the oppressive authoritarian Yatterman regime, which was fairly easy as the authoritarian regime would not be established until 2015.
December 16, 1979: Anime Maru journalists expose Count Lazare d’Cagliostro’s counterfeiting operation entirely through their own investigative skills and with no help from master thief Arsene Lupin III.
February 19, 1980: Anime Maru continues to rise to prominence for its coverage of the infamous VHS shortage, which was a result of the 1979 energy crisis.
January 7, 1983: Always ahead of the game, Anime Maru releases its first web edition, only available to the researchers currently inventing the Internet.
October 24, 1984: Anime Maru proves that Walter Mondale’s waifu is shit, causing him to lose the Presidential election.
May 6, 1986: Anime Maru begins coverage on the Great Subs vs. Dubs war. Countless journalists lose their lives in the process.
March 27, 1996: Anime Maru publishes it’s Pulitzer winning piece analyzing the true meaning of Evangelion’s ending, “On Stress and Budget Cuts.”
July 1998: Anime News Network is created. It fails to live up to Anime Maru’s majesty.
September 8, 1998: Pokemon anime premieres in America, leading to a journalism war between Anime Maru and P4RGaming over whose domain the news is.
September 1, 2001: Anime Maru relocates from its former high-rise NYC offices. No particular reason was given.
August 24, 2005: Anime Maru relocates from its former downtown New Orleans offices. No particular reason was given.
March 13, 2007: Anime Maru breaks the story of the mistreatment of child detectives given only letters for names, a scandal then known as “Watarigate.”
February 28, 2014: Anime Maru suffers a great server crash and headquarters fire simultaneously, losing all known copies of any articles published before February 23rd, 2014.
March 1, 2015: Anime Maru receives the 2015 Reporters Without Borders Excellence in Journalism Award. The award selection committee cited Anime Maru’s coverage of events both of geopolitical importance and relevance to the anime community. To celebrate this award, we at Anime Maru have decided to reflect upon the vast history that led us to receive it, and the various important stories we have broken over the past few decades.
November 3, 20XX: Comments section is still full of people believing these articles.