Category Archives: News

Dominique “SonicFox” McLean to Star in Lead Role in Live Action “Sonic the Hedgehog” Movie

Less than a week after his surprising win at the Video Game Awards, Dominique “SonicFox” McLean has reportedly signed a multi-million dollar deal with Paramount Animation to portray the world…

Galactic Overlord Worries This Might Actually Be His Final Form

SLAVE PLANET 38W, Crab Claw Nebula — Among the Death Pits and Abyss Nodes of Planet 38W, hundreds of thousands of slaves from a countless different species toil by the…

Hasbro Announces Live Action Gobots Movie, Netflix Anime

PAWTUCKET, RI — In an early morning press conference, toy giant Hasbro announced they had secured the rights to release both a live action movie and a Netflix original animated…

Thousands of ‘SSSS.Gridman’ Fans Hospitalized After No Nut November

ROCHESTER, MN — Hospitals across the country have been reporting an outbreak of unknown origin suddenly appearing in the last week, with hundreds hospitalized with similar symptoms. Oddly, the only…

Talking Giraffe Makes Final Selections for College Football Playoff

GRAPEVINE, TX — A mysterious talking giraffe has selected Alabama, Clemson, Notre Dame, and Oklahoma to participate in the College Football Playoff as it revealed the finalized rankings of the…

Risque JRPG ‘Blossom Bosoms’ Blocked From Western Release

The upcoming game release of Blossom Bosoms was canceled for its launch in North America following trouble with getting the title approved. The title launched in Japan earlier this year…

Could Announcement that ‘Neon Genesis Evangelion’ is Coming to Netflix be an Evangelion Reference?

Earlier this week, Netflix announced several new anime that will be added to their streaming library in 2019, including the 1996 seminal classic Neon Genesis Evangelion. Keen-eyed observers were quick to…

Local Man Dies of Heart Attack of the Cards

ROSEMONT, IL — Tensions were high at last night’s Yu-Gi-Oh! Championship Series tournament as over 1300 men and three women competed for a chance to participate in next year’s national…

Area Man Struggles to Find Acceptable Conversation Topic at Family Dinner Table

MILFORD, CT – A Connecticut man found himself unable to find a suitable topic of conversation at the family dinner table earlier this evening. Reports indicate that Andrew Klein, 29,…

‘Goblin Slayer’ to Feature More Shots of Birds in Order to Seem More “Artistic”, Less “Edgy”

Latest episode of Goblin Slayer confused, and amused, audiences with its closing scene — a near 2-minute close-up of a bird’s eye, followed by the credit roll. Though this sparked speculation about…