PARIS – Fearing that the word animé is now nothing more than a foreign word describing Japanese animation, the Académie française announced today that to protect the French language a new word would have to be put in place to describe it.
“Nous avons le grand respect pour les Japonais,” said a spokesman for the institute on the condition that their words not be translated. “Mais ils n’ont pas ce mot.”
Reactions from Japan have been mixed on this very divisive issue.
“We are negotiating with the government to see if they will reconsider their decision,” Japanese Ambassador to France Suzuki Yoichi said late this afternoon. “We know they were upset at the reaction to Mr. [Thomas] Romain’s involvement in an anime series, but they should think about the effect this announcement is having on us.”
“They can take that word from the cold dead hands of the residents of Akiba,” said Governor of Tokyo Masuzoe Yoichi. “The French Government thinks they can decide what we call our anime. I’ll just send some of those involved in the rioting over to Paris and see how those cheese eating surrender monkeys like it.”
In rebuilt Akiba, a few tourists from France were bemused at the entire situation.
“Wasn’t Masuzoe married to a French woman at some point?” correctly questioned Robert Lanoe on his first visit to Japan. “There must be some election soon.”