‘Land of the Lustrous’ Superfan Spends $500 Million on Life-Sized Diamond Figure

In a true show of devotion, one Houseki no Kuni (Land of the Lustrous) fan spent over $500 million on a life-sized figure of his favorite character, Diamond. Land of the Lustrous is a show featuring characters who are living gemstones, one of whom is Diamond, and the figure is 5 feet 2 inches tall and made entirely of real diamonds.

The fan, who wished to remain anonymous and asked our publication only to refer to him by the initials “MZ” told us, “Ever since I created Facebook I’ve had this hole in my heart that I’ve never quite been able to fill no matter what I buy, and like many loners with depression I turned to anime.”

In 2017 MZ watched Land of the Lustrous and was instantly drawn to the character Diamond. “I loved how sweet and hardworking Diamond is. She/they/it/xhe is definitely my waifu, and I knew I needed to bring Diamond into the real world.”

While some manufacturers have built life-size statues of characters such as Megumi Kato and Rem before, for MZ these figures weren’t nearly good enough.

“Those trash figures are just plastic, nothing like the characters they represent. I was so happy to discover Diamond because I can create her out of materials I’m actually able to purchase legally, so it was just a matter of obtaining enough diamonds.”

MZ started out by purchasing the biggest diamonds he could find, but at some point realized it was cheaper to just invest in the diamond mines themselves. “I worked those miners day and night to bring my Diamond to life as soon as possible. Many otaku say they’d do anything for their waifu, but I don’t think anyone else has nearly as much blood on their hands as I do.”

The diamonds were then professionally sculpted, and the Diamond figure was unveiled yesterday. MZ says that he is “very pleased” with the figure, particularly with its cleavage.

About the author

Bob_Squob is neither a Bob nor a Squob, but they’re both common enough names to form an alias. After roaming the earth for 10,000 years with no purpose, he came upon Anime Maru, and thought to himself, “It is good. I will make my home here.” He currently resides in the darkness for fear that his taste in anime will be discovered and exploited as a weakness. Twitter: @Bob_Squob