Man Not Actually Watching Any Anime, Following This Season Through Twitter Screencaps

Howard calls a friend to advise him of the superiority of his own waifu.

Howard calls a friend to advise him of the superiority of his own waifu

O’FALLON, MO — Anime fan and Twitter user Chris Howard has publicly admitted that he is not actually watching any anime this season, opting instead to follow the entire season entirely through screenshots posted on Twitter.

“Actually, watching anime is an rookie mistake a lot of new anime fans make,” Howard tells Anime Maru. “It takes a seasoned anime fan like me to know that you don’t actually need to watch any anime at all in order to know what’s going on in every episode of every anime each season; all you need to know is which collection of anime critics and twitter personalities to follow on Twitter, and you’ll get basically the whole experience from there.”

Whenever a new episode premieres, rather than going to a streaming website Chris instead turns to Twitter, where he can get a play-by-play of everything that happens in the episode. “Literally the second any anime episode premieres, I’ve got dozens of people posting screencaps from the episode, and since everything is subtitled I don’t even need the sound. Not only that, but I get the added bonus of everyone’s commentary on the episode, which makes me feel like I’m part of a conversation despite the fact that I haven’t actually seen the subject material. My eventual goal is to be following enough accounts that I get enough screencaps that I actually get every frame from any given episode, and can create animation just by scrolling through the pictures on my feed.”

“Honestly though, I really owe it all to those brave souls who are willing to screencap the episodes and post them to Twitter. I’m glad these philanthropic souls understand that when I come to Twitter, what I really want is for every enjoyable moment in anime to appear on my feed before I could ever get a chance to watch the anime myself. They don’t let me buy into weakness and let me form my own reaction to the anime, but instead present me with a reaction ahead of time so I don’t have to form a genuine opinion. Considering the fact that these Twitter posts often appear on your feed with no warning whatsoever, I’m not sure why anyone would use Twitter if they didn’t want to be instantly spoiled on all currently airing anime.”

About the author

Bob_Squob is neither a Bob nor a Squob, but they’re both common enough names to form an alias. After roaming the earth for 10,000 years with no purpose, he came upon Anime Maru, and thought to himself, “It is good. I will make my home here.” He currently resides in the darkness for fear that his taste in anime will be discovered and exploited as a weakness. Twitter: @Bob_Squob