Philips Announces the CD-i Classic Mini Game Console

Major technology conglomerate Philips announced that they will be re-entering the video game space with the launch of the their own retro game console. Set for release later this year,…

Op-Ed: ‘Darling in the Franxx’ is Literally ‘Guilty Crown’ and You Idiots Fell for It

  Atsushi Nishigori Director, Darling in the Franxx During the weeks leading up to Darling in the Franxx‘s premiere, I couldn’t help but notice all of the positive attention and…

Sanrio Acquires License to Bongo Cat

SHINGAWA, TOKYO, Japan – Sanrio is world famous for its Hello Kitty brand, which has gone on to be one of the most recognizable and prolific brands of all time following…

FBI Establishes ‘Loli Abuse Intervention Force’

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The FBI announced earlier this week the establishment of the Loli Abuse Intervention Force (a.k.a. L-FORCE). The unit’s primary function is stated to be the protection of petite…

Local Public Library Still Has No Fucking Idea What a Manga is

WILKINSBURG, PA — There has been a growing sense of confusion at Wilkinsburg Public Library this month, following a very unusual set of book donations through from an anonymous source….

Japanese Company Really Sorry About Bad Thing It Did

Japanese publishing company Kadokawa posted a public apology earlier today, expressing “profound regret” for doing something that upset fans. While observers are not quite sure what incidents the company could…

Haruhi Suzumiya Fans Excited for Annual Disappointment

As 2018 enters its last quarter, Kadokawa is once again busy preparing an elaborate let-down for all the fans of the Haruhi Suzumiya franchise. Observers around the world are eagerly…

Makoto Shinkai Ends Career to Stream Fortnite

The industry was taken by surprise today as Makoto Shinkai, director of critically acclaimed anime films including Your Name and Garden of Words, announced that he would be ending his career in…

‘Fate/Grand Order’ Revenue at All-Time Low After Latest Event Sends Entire Fanbase to Prison

Google search histories became a little bit safer today following the arrest of nearly every adult who had made a purchase in the popular dating sim/online casino, Fate/Grand Order.

The mass arrests were in direct response to the newest Fate/Grand Order event, where players were transported to a mystical world ruled by magical scantily-clad 12-year-olds. Upon completion of the event, players are gifted with one such minor to do their bidding in future events. Upon reaching the maximum level, players can receive a JPEG image which, for legal reasons, we are unable to claim to have seen. Those with enough luck, or money, can obtain additional underage soldiers for assistance with grinding more upcoming events.

Leading Japanese University to Introduce ‘Cells at Work!’ into Medical Course Curriculum

TOKYO, Japan — After the sudden surge in popularity of Akane Shimizu’s “Cells at Work!” manga series following its well received anime adaptation this season, the University of Tokyo has…