Recent Death Attributed to Sword Art Offline

FUKUOKA, Japan — The mysterious death of 24-year-old Takashima Ryuuji has been linked to the action-fantasy RPG Sword Art Offline. Sources state that Ryuuji was an obsessive player of Sword Art…

Bandai Namco Ordered to Put Warnings Labels on iDOLM@STER Products

TOKYO, Japan — A Tokyo Superior Metropolitan judge ordered toy and video game company Bandai Namco to apply labeling to all products related to The iDOLM@STER warning consumers of the dangers of becoming…

Toei Explains Sailor Moon Crystal Schedule: ‘Only So Much Outrage We Can Take Each Month’

TOKYO – Toei Animation responded today to complaints that Sailor Moon Crystal had a bimonthly airing schedule instead of a regular weekly schedule. According to an official statement by the studio, fans…

Local Otaku In Huge Trouble for Forgetting Yazawa Nico’s Birthday

ST. PAUL, MN — While sitting on the bus on his way from work, local otaku James Kailmann suddenly realized to his terror that he has completely forgotten that today…

Hundreds Mugged as Bewildered Otaku Visit New Jersey

CAMDEN, NJ― The Camden Police Department, already suffering from a critical shortage of manpower, has a new problem on their hands. Since last week, an abnormal surge in interest in…

Aldnoah Zero Early Impressions

We are now three episodes in to the highly anticipated action mecha anime Aldnoah Zero, produced by A-1 Pictures featuring writing from Urobuchi Gen. Here are the key takeaways from…

Japan Forms Teenage Task Force to Strike Back Against Teenage Criminals

TOKYO — After a rash of attacks by groups of teenage criminals that have so far gone without a single arrest, the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department has formed a task…

New Anime-Planet Can Potentially Sustain Life, Scientists Claim

SANTA CRUZ, CA — Astronomers browsing the internet at the University of California Santa Cruz announced the discovery of a redesigned Anime-Planet website so close to Earth that it is visible to the…

Report: US Anime Sales Suffer Due to Being Judged by Cashier

BURBANK, CA — An industry report released this week confirmed that sales of anime Blu-rays and DVD’s are suffering due to consumers’ fear of being judged by cashiers. The report claims that…

Popular Science Magazine Bans ‘Moe Denialists’

NEW YORK, NY – Popular Science magazine has announced a ban on all submissions denying the effects of moe on anime culture. “We simply cannot continue to serve as a…