Japan Falling Behind in Education Because Students are Idols, Superheroes, etc.

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TOYKO, Japan — Japan’s Ministry of Education confirmed earlier this week that according to standardized test results, Japanese high school students have dropped out of the top 10 in terms of overall performance compared to other developed nations. The most recent Program for International Student Assessment (PISA) results show that the biggest regressions are in math and science. The reason for this decline may be surprising to many.

“Our studies have shown that more and more high school and middle school aged students are being distracted by a higher calling and find themselves unable to dedicate any time to their education,” a report released by the Ministry of Education states.

The report continues to note that, “Student routinely believe that investigating alien parasitic lifeforms, winning the Holy Grail War, playing virtual reality video games, running a failing theme park, and being a school idol are more important than going to class.”

School administrators are not the only ones concerned by this alarming trend. Many students have voiced concern over their own future prospects.

“While I gained confidence and maturity from my experience as a magical girl, I fear that literally becoming God does not fully prepare me for the difficulties of real life,” said middle school student Kaname Madoka. She regretfully admits that she has not attended class in several years.

Owaga Eriko, a mathematics teacher in Shizuoka Prefecture, tells Anime Maru that several of her students have stopped coming to class in the last month.

“Two girls sent me a note that they we going on a nationwide concert tour, one boy says his mech piloting skills were requested by the military,and a bunch more are out playing some magical card game. It’s ridiculous, I barely have anyone left in class.”

According to figures publicly released by the Ministry of Education: 12% of students are idols, 39% are involved with supernatural or magical affairs, 24% are preoccupied with miscellaneous non-academic activities, and the remaining 25% are characters in romance anime.

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Editor-in-Chief, CEO, and Fearless Leader of Anime Maru. He was trained by the North Korean People's Institute of Journalism and Media. kevo follows voice actresses on Twitter and pretends to understand their Japanese tweets. Twitter: @kevo31415