In a joint statement today, the entire American population announced their intention to ignore Kochouki: Wakaki Nobunaga, the latest anime adaptation starring Japanese historical figure Oda Nobunaga, just as they have done so for all prior anime with the same subject matter.
Kochouki: Wakaki Nobunaga is described by MyAnimeList as “a historical drama boldly adapting the life of Oda Nobunaga in his teens.” This bold adaptation follows prior stories starring Oda Nobunaga, such as Nobunaga the Fool, Nobunaga Concerto, Nobunaga no Shinobi, DJ Nobunaga, Nobanagun, and Spring 2019’s Nobunaga-sensei no Osanazuma, all of which were watched by exactly zero Americans.
“We want to make this as clear as possible: We will not pay attention to anything starring Oda Nobunaga, no matter what you do with him.” America stated. “We don’t care if it’s a wacky comedy or if Nobunaga is a blonde anime girl, there is nothing you can do to make us care about anything with his name on it.”
America has also clarified that they have no interest in any works that include Oda Nobunaga even if they do not star him, such as Sengoku Basara and Drifters.
“You really should have taken the hint when none of us bought Pokemon + Nobunaga’s Ambition. You paired Nobunaga with the most popular franchise in the world and changed the name to Pokemon Conquest, but America cannot be tricked into caring about Oda Nobunaga.
In response to this statement, Japan has announced 17 new anime projects starring Oda Nobunaga.