Blog Archives

Studio Pierrot Refuses to Release New ‘Tokyo Ghoul: Re’ Blu-rays to “Filthy Anime-Onlys”

Controversy emerged today in Mitaka, Tokyo as Studio Pierrot has officially declared that Blu-ray discs for all future seasons of its once-popular anime Tokyo Ghoul: re will only be made…

Area Man Makes Concrete Progress on His Plan-to-Watch List

BUFORD, GA — Local authorities resolved a missing persons case this week upon discovering the reported individual had been making actual progress on his anime plan-to-watch list. Nathan Sadler had…

‘Fate/Grand Order’ Revenue at All-Time Low After Latest Event Sends Entire Fanbase to Prison

Google search histories became a little bit safer today following the arrest of nearly every adult who had made a purchase in the popular dating sim/online casino, Fate/Grand Order.

The mass arrests were in direct response to the newest Fate/Grand Order event, where players were transported to a mystical world ruled by magical scantily-clad 12-year-olds. Upon completion of the event, players are gifted with one such minor to do their bidding in future events. Upon reaching the maximum level, players can receive a JPEG image which, for legal reasons, we are unable to claim to have seen. Those with enough luck, or money, can obtain additional underage soldiers for assistance with grinding more upcoming events.