Category Archives: News

Food Left on Counter Since 2015 Ages Almost as Badly as ‘Food Wars!’

BUFORD, GA — A lone bowl of what was once instant ramen sits forgotten on a kitchen counter.  Cobwebs anchor it down but do nothing to contain the smell of…

Report: Average Anime Protagonist Doesn’t Have the Ability to Read

A recent study conducted by the National Graduate Institute for Policy Studies has found that anime protagonists significantly under-perform academically compared to their peers, with many being unable to even…

Land Speed Record Broken by Eurobeat Powered Hatchback

The fastest speed ever recorded over land was beaten earlier today by a vehicle reportedly propelled by the power of Eurobeat. The record setting vehicle, a modified Toyota hatchback, was…

Modest Anime Fan Politely Calls Show ‘Watashi no Hero Academia’

WILSON, NC — Hoping not to come off as too casual or direct in a formal setting, local student Derek Finnegan has referred to the popular superhero action franchise as…

‘Little Witch Academia’ Movies To Leave Netflix, Join Mixer

Netflix has confirmed that the two Little Witch Academia movies are scheduled to leave the streaming platform on October 9 to begin streaming exclusively on Mixer. Little Witch Academia is…

Ahogamer Reviews: KFC Dating Sim AKA the Abrupt End of All Visual Novels

The Kentucky Fried Chicken dating simulator, officially known as I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin’ Good Dating Simulator has finally hit the Steam store. There’s a certain sense…

Anime Maru’s Guide to the Re Cinematic Universe

One of the most prominent anime franchises in the last decade is also one of the least talked about, and much like the Marvel or Fate universes it is complex…

Thousands of People Abruptly Transported to Alternate Worlds

Parallel worlds across the infinite multiverses reported huge influxes of people in strange clothes suddenly appearing earlier today, putting great strains on their populations. “Usually we get one every few…

Netflix Documentary ‘Enter the Anime’ Now Officially Anime, According to Netflix

LOS GATOS, CA – Earlier today, Netflix announced that their anime documentary Enter the Anime is now officially anime, according to a press release sent to anime news publications in…

Karaoke Staff Tired of Hearing Evangelion Theme

OSAKA, Japan – Employees at a karaoke establishment have grown sick of hearing a particular song every single night, according to local reports. The song “A Cruel Angel’s Thesis”, known…