Category Archives: News

Area Man Finds His Car Vandalized, Pretty Sure J.C.Staff is to Blame

CONWAY, SC – Last Saturday night, Nathan Hayes suddenly woke up to loud banging noises, followed by a screeching car alarm, only to find his 2013 Dodge Dart sitting on…

Area Man Very Vague About Keeping Up with ‘Miru Tights’

BILLINGS, MT – A Montana man has been suspiciously vague this week concerning whether or not he has been watching the latest episodes of the anime short series Miru Tights….

‘Death Stranding’ to be First Ever Feature Film to Include Pre-order DLC

Sony has broken new ground this week following an announcement that the highly anticipated motion picture Death Stranding, produced, directed, and written by industry auteur Hideo Kojima, will be the…

34th Annual Sanrio Character Ranking Won by Russian Bear Hack-san

TOKYO, Japan – Sanrio has announced that the 34th annual Sanrio Character Ranking has been officially won in a surprisingly upset by Russian bear character, Hack-san. “While some might view…

Teresa May Resigns Following ‘One Punch Man 2nd Season’ Endorsement

Months of political turmoil came to a head this week as embattled British Prime Minister Teresa May announced her resignation amidst her poor handling Brexit and even poorer taste in…

Alabama Refuses to Air Episode of ‘Arthur’ Featuring Gay Wedding, Airs ‘Oreimo’ Instead

BIRMINGHAM, AL — Alabama Public Television has announced that it will not air an episode of the children’s show Arthur that features a same-sex marriage, and will resolve to air…

UK Royal Baby Retroactively Named “Lelouch vi Mountbatten-Windsor” in a Surprising Case of Ominous Foreshadowing

Buckingham Palace delivered a shocking announcement yesterday, recalling the name “Archie” and renaming the newborn royal baby of Prince Harry and the former Meghan Markle retroactively “Lelouch vi Mountbatten-Windsor”. According…

Suspension Dropped After Student Discovered to be Harem Protagonist

TOKYO, Japan – Sources report that local student Yuji Aono was on the brink of being suspended from Masaki High School for a series of inappropriate behaviors with other students…

Type-Moon Publishes Complete Encyclopedia of the ‘Fate’ Series

Copies of Type-Moon’s official encyclopedic guide to the Fate series became available to fans starting today. Simply titled “The Complete Guide to the Fate”, the new book aims to provide…

Asuna from ‘Sword Art Online’ Denies Claims From Countless Otaku That They Dated

Yuuki Asuna has denied allegations she ever dated the thousands of otaku claiming on social media that they were in a relationship with the Sword Art Online heroine many years…