College Party Turns Awkward After DJ Starts Playing Vocaloid


PULLMAN, WA – A local college party went from casual celebration to socially awkward gathering when the DJ recruited for the evening began mixing various Vocaloid tracks into his set.

Attendees of the party on the Washington State University campus were initially pleased with the selection of songs chosen by the school’s resident DJ, Kyle Warner, featuring popular electronic artists such as Tiesto, David Guetta, and Calvin Harris. Half an hour into the party, however, Warner reportedly cut the audio, declared that mainstream music “was for normies”, and abruptly resumed his set with Vocaloid tracks.

According to attendees, the atmosphere quickly turned uncomfortable. Raving died down to an awkward nodding session, and some partygoers ceased socializing and checked on their phones in the dark corner of the venue. In total, the party only lasted a mere hour before the venue emptied.

“At first, I was like, what’s this strange Japanese robot music?”, an anonymous attendee told Anime Maru. “Then I realized it was probably that ‘Vocaloid’ thing that weird guy in class is always rambling about. It was alright, I guess.”

“He had so many better options”, says John Lee, another bystander. “You have plenty of artists who fit the bill for this kinda stuff. livetune, Hachioji-P, Teddyloid, BIGHEAD, to name a few. But instead, this guy decides to play some obscure shit he found in the nether regions of NicoNico.”

“It wasn’t even dance music”, said Brian Vo, another attendee. “Most of it was shady stuff about death and suicide. The final straw for me was when he remixed ‘The Disappearance of Hatsune Miku’ to the beat of Eminem’s ‘Rap God’. I couldn’t sleep that night.”

Warner, however, remains adamantly defendant regarding the incident.

“People just don’t understand what real music is,” Warner said. “Mainstream music achieves nothing new nowadays. I simply wanted to expose them to the innovative force that is Vocaloid.”

Despite the scale of the fiasco, the event’s organizer was relieved that the event was not as catastrophic as last year’s Homecoming dance, where the DJ began playing nightcore and remixes of Touhou music.

About the author

Sustaining on instant noodles and a wavering DSL connection, it is uncertain how Vestro has continued to survive let alone still form a cognitive thought. Regardless, he still manages to come out of his soba induced coma now and then. He can be found spending his time pretending to understand Japanese media as well as picking up the remaining shards of his broken dreams.