In response to absolutely no one, Funko, a major manufacturer of licensed collectibles, announced today the launch of a new release in their Pop figure line of that one thing that you like.
The Funko Pop will feature the toy line’s signature face of two black soulless eyes, a triangle nose, and complete lack of mouth – the expressionless face missing any of the personality of the character you grew so fond over. The body of the figure was shown in a template standing pose highlighting the love and care that could have, but did not, go into its creation
The figure will also have several limited edition variants such as a version made entirely out of plastic chrome and another where several pounds of glitter have been dumped into the molds. The editions will have a limited production run serving as a prime example of value through artificial scarcity rather than craftsmanship.
Although not formally announced, Funko is expected to provide additional Pop releases of characters in that franchise you adore so much, further making you question your dedication to the series.
The Funko Pops will be available in the next upcoming weeks from select major retailers, conventions, GameStop locations, subscription boxes, and gifts from family members who don’t quite have a grasp of what your hobbies actually are.