TOKYO, Japan – Area high school student Rito Shikimori found that his parents had returned from their 786 day trip abroad unexpectedly this morning, according to a Facebook post. The couple had inexplicably left for the trip shortly before their son’s entrance into high school, leaving the teenager in charge of their residence.
“Crazy news, guys. My parents came back. I thought I’d have all of my high school time unsupervised,” wrote Shikimori in a Facebook post. “Though I’m not sure how I will explain my hot cousin, a space alien, a talking cat, and a robot maid I am mistakenly engaged to now all living in our one bedroom apartment.”
Shikimori’s classmates were baffled to find out he actually had parents at all.
“Like, he hasn’t mentioned them even once, and I’m his best friend,” said fellow student Sora Nagi. “I’ve been to his house like a million times and never saw any evidence of them existing. Although we usually get distracted by some wacky hijinks like someone declaring interstellar war or something like that.”
“I don’t like Rito at all, he’s a complete baka,” declared classmate Yui Zenigata. “I don’t care about his well-being at all, but his parents being away for that long has to be illegal, right?”
Anime Maru reached out to the Shikimori’s parents by email for comment on the situation.
“Is it strange? When I was a boy I don’t remember ever seeing my parents at all,” said father Genma Shikimori in an email to Anime Maru. “I think parents being absent is just the Japanese way.”
Anime Maru tried to conduct a face to face interview with parents Genma and Nodoka Shikimori but found that they had already left town, telling family they were going to a hot spring in China. Coincidentally, police were also looking to question the couple related to the disappearance of a priceless diamond that happened to be on display in Tokyo during their visit.