Local Student Sure to be Receiving Chocolate any Moment Now

TACOMA, WA – A local student at Sonoma High School is expected to receive Valentine’s Day chocolate at any minute, area sources say. High school senior David Turner has been seen patiently waiting throughout the afternoon earlier today for a girl to approach him and give him the traditional holiday treats. With not much time left in the school day, Turner claims that it is only a matter of time.

Past investigation revealed that Turner had not received any Valentine’s Day chocolate in any of his three prior years as a high school student. Despite his experiences in the past, Turner remained confident that this year would be different.

“If you think about it, this is the last year that something like this can occur. If someone has been suppressing how they really feel, just waiting for a moment to confess, today would have to be the day they would have to do it,” Turner told our correspondent.

The 18 year old student did his best to contain his anticipation, putting on a neutral expression throughout the day in order to avoid spoiling the moment of any potential love confessions. Turner claimed that there were many possible situations where it could happen such as during transitions between class periods, before club activities, or even in a vacant school hallway.

“I bet she’s one of those shy girls if she’s taking this long to approach me,” added Turner. “I’ve got to be sure to leave plenty of openings so she has time to build her confidence up first.”

Turner was last seen waiting in an empty classroom with only the warm orange glow of the setting sun providing the last glimpse of light. Despite prodding from janitorial staff to leave, Turner insisted it was the ideal confession setting and that it would not be much longer.

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Sustaining on instant noodles and a wavering DSL connection, it is uncertain how Vestro has continued to survive let alone still form a cognitive thought. Regardless, he still manages to come out of his soba induced coma now and then. He can be found spending his time pretending to understand Japanese media as well as picking up the remaining shards of his broken dreams.