PHOENIX, AZ — 23 year old man David Barbano was found dead in his house in what appeared to be a last effort to achieve his life goal of building a harem. Close friends reported that he always dreamed of having his own harem held in the same high esteem as that of Nisekoi.
Barbano’s death was revealed to be a directly influenced by the currently airing anime Re:Zero. Barbano’s suicide note explains, “Re:Zero was always just a ploy to get all the girls. But after years of failure, anything is worth a try.”
It appeared that Barbano did indeed have a girlfriend but continuously failed to expand the female count beyond one. “They would always break up with me before I could get to two. They alleged it was ‘cheating’”. Barbano lamented in his letter, each word heavy with a drawn out angst.
Members of the anime community reacted to Barbano’s suicide with distaste. One MAL user oniisan79 wrote in a thread, “even though some guys like Subaru just have all the luck in the world, you need to accept that the rest of us simply aren’t good enough; the world hasn’t chosen us to be the ones to be granted with unlimited revivals until every girl is won over. Those who commit suicide—that’s just weak and tasteless. Look at all the other guys who obey Emiya Shirou’s postulate of life. They get a harem on the first go. If you truly wanted it, you just have to work harder, not follow some voodoo method like killing yourself.”
Barbano ended his letter with hopeful thoughts: “I can’t help but hope that it’ll be me. Even though I’m far too old for it and avoid helping people as much as I can, the world might just choose me to be the one who gets to live again and again.”
The funeral was held earlier this week, where Barbano’s body was cremated with no signs of return.
This is completely tasteless, holy shit. Like it’s not even funny, it’s just… mean and tasteless.
tfw no harem
Well there’s your problem.
When you pick someone to be your girlfriend, you already kill the harem.
Look at how that shit worked for Tomoyo from Clannad. Or the brother from OreImo.
Not true. It worked just fine for Issei from Highschool DxD.
True. I hope to have my own harem
Some day
Its satire fam smfh.
Source?
wow. out of all harems that guy chose to be inspired by re:zero?! thats one of the gloomiest anime of recent seasons! who in their right mind would like to be in subaru’s place? obviously not that guy, being not in the right mind 🙂
David Barbano is truly slothful
Being a “Harem King” is a matter of Perspective. For example over the past 5 years I’ve been able to get over 10 hot girls (Mostly Asians) to shower naked for me, wear stockings & Twin-pigtails, and even wear cute skirts while a fan blows their clothes up with very little money (like less than $100 total) on MyFreeCams (dot) com.
While I’ll never actually meet these gals face-to-face (I’ve skyped & phoned w/ a few) I still got to know them a bit, made a human connection, picked the girls I wanted, & got the exact experience I wanted (as if I was actually there) albeit on Webcam. It was still in real time & my participation (and hers) that made it happen. I got the experience (XP) & so did she – No one can say it didn’t happen & that I wasn’t actually “involved” (There’s even videos *koff*).
Point is- Be a Harem King within the bounds of your “current Reality”. We all have dreams, we all love the ladies, we all love Anime Ladies- Maybe someday one of us will create a “Live Harem Experience” or Guys can have Virtual Reality Harem’s w/ real girls from around the globe? Chat Sessions that become “virtual orgies”- Our Loves & Lusts may bring us all together faster than we think.
Hang On to your dreams you Anime fans…the Harem dream will never die as long as we support Anime & our love our Kawaii loving Asian beauties.