Man’s Attempt to Become Ramen Connoisseur Ends with Heart Disease and Disappointment

 

Inspired by the anime Ramen Daisuki Koizumi-san, a man’s goal of becoming a ramen connoisseur like the series’ protagonist ended in failure this week. Christopher Ronne, a 36-year-old businessman, attempted to follow in Koizumi’s footsteps by sampling a large variety of ramen, eating it for nearly every meal. The high sodium diet, which consisted of nearly 5000 calories per day, didn’t take long to start taking a toll on the man’s health. Within weeks, his blood pressure had risen dramatically as he began to gain weight and started losing energy.

“I don’t understand. Koizumi eats multiple bowls of ramen every single day and never seems to gain any weight. It looked so delicious in the show that I wanted to try experiencing the joy of ramen myself, but now all I want to do is take a nap,” Ronne stated under strained breath.

The Center of Cardiovascular Health has advised others to avoid a diet like Koizumi’s, which consists of over four times the recommended amount of sodium for an average adult. The center cites an increased risk of stroke in individuals who consume a large amount of daily sodium as well as other potential long term risks to heart health.

“Shows like Ramen Daisuki Koizumi-san are dangerous as they create the illusion that not only can one eat whatever they want, but that they will somehow be able to make friends and form personal relationships in the process,” commented a representative from the CCH.

Ronne confirmed that despite putting on a cold outward appearance and ignoring his colleagues, not once was he approached by someone during one of his meals to initiate a spontaneous discussion about ramen. As the weeks went on, Ronne began purposely picking new ramen restaurants to increase the chance of coincidentally running into someone.

“I should have learned by now after my last incident with Koufuku Graffiti that food can’t fill the hole in my heart, only stop it,” admitted Ronne. “I’m never watching another food based anime again.”

About the author

Editor-in-Chief, CEO, and Fearless Leader of Anime Maru. He was trained by the North Korean People's Institute of Journalism and Media. kevo follows voice actresses on Twitter and pretends to understand their Japanese tweets. Twitter: @kevo31415