Morgan Freeman to Narrate Documentary About Penguin who Fell in Love with Anime Character Cutout


Today Warner Brothers announced that Morgan Freeman will be narrating an upcoming documentary about a penguin named Grape-kun from the Tobu Zoo in Japan. Grape-kun recently gained fame for falling in love with a cardboard cutout of the Kemono Friends character Hululu. The film has the working title “Waifu of the Penguin,” and is considered a follow-up to the 2005 documentary “March of the Penguins.”

A spokesperson for the Warner Bros Picture Group told reporters, “Ever since Al Gore announced he was making a sequel to An Inconvenient Truth, we decided it was time to capitalize on people’s nostalgia for March of the Penguins, as it’s one of the 3 or so documentaries that people have actually seen. So we scoured the news for anything penguin related, and as soon as we heard about Grape-kun we sent a film crew immediately and started work.”

“We’ve made sure to go all out on this project, tracking Grape-kun’s history from his devastating break-up to his discovery of a new, more cardboard love. We’ve hired scientists to exposit on the superiority of 2D, and we even brought on staff from Warner Animation Group to re-animate scenes from Kemono Friends to the point where they’re actually passable for American audiences.”

Morgan Freeman expressed excitement for the project to reporters. “I feel like this new subject material provides a nice contrast to the original, which was a story about the long and arduous struggle penguins are willing to undergo to ensure that their offspring survives. This is a story about a penguin who never leaves his home and has basically zero chance of ever reproducing, which I think speaks to the current generation a lot more.”

Waifu of the Penguin has received a tentative R rating from the MPAA for extended scenes of furious penguin masturbation.

About the author

Bob_Squob is neither a Bob nor a Squob, but they’re both common enough names to form an alias. After roaming the earth for 10,000 years with no purpose, he came upon Anime Maru, and thought to himself, “It is good. I will make my home here.” He currently resides in the darkness for fear that his taste in anime will be discovered and exploited as a weakness. Twitter: @Bob_Squob