HURON, SD — Local otaku John Steiner has attained the rare accomplishment of a Facebook friend list of exclusively those with anime profile pics, according to his disappointed family members.
“I’m heartbroken, but I finally had to unfriend my dear son Johnny on Facebook,” said John’s mother, Joan Steiner. “Eight memes about Dragon Ball Z posted before noon is not something any human being, anime fan or not, should have to put up with.”
“He finally is only friends with other weeaboos? Not a surprise. I had to delete him months ago,” said John’s cousin, Clara Johnson. “Dude won’t stop posting poorly photoshopped pictures of scantily-clad shounen female love interests, but yet says he still doesn’t have time to watch Carole and Tuesday or has even heard of Fruits Basket.”
Predictably, anime fans on Twitter had opinions about Steiner’s accomplishments.
“As far as I’m concerned, that dude has attained otaku wizard status,” said Twitter user BulmaIZBloomers. “I’ve tried to isolate myself from normies, but my mom keeps forcing me to talk to her when I ask for money to pay my bills.”
“I’ve got all the feels about this accomplishment and what it suggests about the otaku movement,” said anime YouTube celebrity SuperAnimeStarWolf. “But if you want my full take and reaction you’ll need to watch my new six-part reaction and unboxing video series on this. Remember to like, subscribe, and check out my Patreon!”
“Not really all that much of an accomplishment, I’ve had it for years,” said Twitter user HarlockWasRight. “Easy enough to do if you just post anime and alt-right memes all day.”
We reached out to Steiner for comment, but was told he didn’t have time to talk as he was too busy watching Dragon Ball Z and it was getting to a good part soon in about twelve to thirteen episodes.