Square Enix Revises Marketing for Bravely Default
TOKYO — In response to declining sales of its new title Bravely Default, Square Enix has reevaluated its marketing for the role-playing video game. The move surprised many in the industry,…
Tensions Flare Over China’s Eldant Empire Claim
BEIJING – Relations between Japan and China were further strained over the latter’s claim of sovereignty over a portion of the newly-discovered Holy Eldant Empire last week. Little is known…
Funimation Seeks New Revenue From Scratch-Off Lottery Tickets
FORT WORTH, TX – Funimation Entertainment, the Flower Mound-based film production company, is turning to an unusual source in its quest to find new revenues: the Texas Lottery. “We’ve been…
Report: Characters in Happiness Charge Precure Named After Strippers
TOKYO – Despite the studio’s efforts to cover up the details of the creative aspects of its scriptwriting process, a report was released this week confirming that the heroines of…
Man Who Tried to Legally Marry Homemade Figures Rebuffed by High Court
SAN FRANCISCO, CA — In what anime fans throughout the United States are decrying as a travesty against justice, the California Supreme Court unanimously affirmed an appellate court’s decision to…
Surveyor Corps Prove Useless in Combat against Titans
TROST DISTRICT – According to recent military intelligence, the newly-assigned Surveyor Corps have already sustained heavy losses early into their first mission. The Surveyor Corps are an elite division of…
Houston Texans Lineman Brennan Williams Admits that He Plays Professional Football
HOUSTON, TX – At a local anime club gathering last night, Brennan Williams admitted to fellow attendees that he not only has an interest in football, but he plays professionally…
Time Travel Accident Erases Steins;Gate From Existence
PEKIN, IL– Fans of Steins;Gate were shocked to discover late last night that the series and its spin offs had been erased from existence. Of course no one noticed…
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