TOKYO-3, Japan — The current COVID-19 outbreak has led to the cancellation of hundreds of events across the world, from major league sports to anime conventions. Thus is it came to no surprise to the people of Japan that the upcoming unification of all mankind via the Black Moon of the Angel Lilith has also been delayed until 2021.
In a press conference from his shadowy lair beneath Tokyo-3, Seele chairmen Keel Lorenz, who, in accordance with social distancing suggestions, spoke to reporters remotely via a black monolith bearing the phrase “sound only”.
“While many of you may have been looking forward to the upcoming fulfillment of the prophecies foretold in the Dead Sea Scrolls, we at Seele and our sister organization Nerv have decided to push back said events until next year,” Lorenz said. “While this may be disappointing to those who were looking forward to all boundaries between mankind’s minds and souls being torn down and your darkest secrets laid bare for all to see, we at Seele suggest practicing social distancing for the time being, as there can be no unification if humanity is wiped out by a simple virus beforehand.”
The press conference comes on the heels of Tokyo-3 being placed under a lockdown order, with only essential services such as restaurants, medical facilities, and mysterious organizations with ill-defined purposes remaining open to aid the citizenry and defend against Angel attacks.