Tag Archives: Local

Very Vocal Guy in History Class Keeps Claiming Emperor Nero was Actually a Woman

TORONTO, Canada — In the back seat of an introductory world history class at York University, freshman James Howard, continues to insist that Emperor Nero has been misunderstood by classical…

Area Man Disappointed to Find Only BTS in Asian Music Section

DOUGLASVILLE, GA – An area resident was disheartened earlier today after browsing local media store FYE. Thomas Soler, 23, said he had entered the FYE location with the hope of…

Man Downgrades Life Goal From Being “The Very Best” to “Relatively Competent”

HARRISBURG, PA – Local man Hans Johanson announced to anyone listening on Medium today that he had downgraded his life goal from being “the very best” down to a much…

Registered Sex Offender Found to be Working as Maid

TOKYO, JAPAN — Prefectural police reported this week that they had arrested ex-JSDF member and registered sex offender Tsubame Kamoi after she had been masquerading as a maid for over…

Kaguya-Sama Fan Stays 3 Steps Ahead of Love Interest by Never Talking to Her

TOWSON, MD — Local otaku Roger Johnson has reportedly been implementing what he has learned from Kaguya-sama: Love is War in his own love life by staying 3 steps ahead…

VPN not Making Roommate’s Browsing Sessions any Less Suspicious

WATERBURY, CT – A Connecticut man has failed to make his late night internet browsing sessions any less suspicious to his roommate despite using a VPN. Matthew Wenter, 25, researched…

Man Living Under Rock Surprised Second Season of ‘Kemono Friends’ is Bad

DUBUQUE, IA — After 7 episodes of Kemono Friends 2, local resident Jordan Sullemeyer expressed confusion and disappointment at the quality of the this season’s continuation of the cult classic 2017 anime….

Local Student Sure to be Receiving Chocolate any Moment Now

TACOMA, WA – A local student at Sonoma High School is expected to receive Valentine’s Day chocolate at any minute, area sources say. High school senior David Turner has been…

Neglected Nesoberi has Seen Unimaginable Things

TERRE HAUTE, IN — Sitting quietly on a shelf in the corner of the room, a large Love Live nesoberi has been silently observing the actions of Tyler Mansfield, 22,…

Local Man Dies of Heart Attack of the Cards

ROSEMONT, IL — Tensions were high at last night’s Yu-Gi-Oh! Championship Series tournament as over 1300 men and three women competed for a chance to participate in next year’s national…