Weird Al Yankovic Covers ‘Cruel Angel’s Thesis’

End of Al


RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CA — Yesterday marked the first time Weird Al ever parodied an anime opening with the release of his new song “Cruel Angle’s Theta”. The song is a parody of the opening to Neon Genesis Evangelion titled “Cruel Angel’s Thesis”. This would make Weird Al the 36th person to cover the song, but he is only the second to actually understand it.

“I always wanted to cover J-Pop.” Weird Al spoke at the song’s unveiling. “Just everything about that genre of music is so bad. The squeaky voices, the overly philosophical lyrics, and despite all that it’s still better than Death Grips.”

According to producers, the rights to Cruel Angel’s Thesis were much easier to acquire than they had anticipated. Gainax quickly took the label’s first offer, fifty dollars and a McDonald’s Happy Meal, claiming that it was the first time any of the staff had eaten in months.

Fan reaction has been underwhelming. The song, true to it’s roots, is entirely spoken in Japanese. With no translation ready available, we only have the word of Weird Al’s Japanese fans to tell us, “it was ok”.

Despite the lukewarm response, “Cruel Angel’s Theta” has become one of the highest downloaded songs on iTunes. This only shows that weeaboos will lap up anything remotely related to Japanese culture, especially if they can’t understand the lyrics.

Many have been quick to criticize Gainax, claiming that Evangelion will lend its name to any product. Of course these rumors are unsubstantiated. Being the greatest anime of all time means that you don’t just slap EVA’s name onto figures, razors, cell phones, and buckets. Evangelion has much more dignity than to sink so low.

When asked about future J-Pop parodies Weird Al was quoted saying, “I’d love to do ‘Grooving Magic’ next. Just hearing the song’s name gets it stuck in my head, and I already know that I can sound like a high pitched Japanese girl.”

These future J-Pop parodies will be collected on his upcoming album The Al-dol-Master.

About the author

Talking about himself in the third person has never be Morlock's strengths, however it would seem that duty calls for a change in POV. Hobbies include: self loathing, mindlessly consuming japanese media like the weeaboo that he is, and complaining. Mad Bull 34 is still the greatest anime Morlock has seen. For some reason he has a Twitter: @TheMorlock