World’s Saddest Prom Happening in High School Otaku’s Basement


Anime Maru is here to bring you live coverage of the hottest party happening tonight, the anime themed prom hosted by otaku high schooler Gavin Campbell within his parent’s basement. This party, planned in a drunken stupor half an hour ago as a reaction to the “social structures” that led to Gavin’s love confession to his longtime crush Charlotte Evans being rejected, is being held concurrently to that other lame prom that all of Gavin’s classmates are attending.

Several of this season’s hottest anime figurines are attending this year’s prom. Fate/Stay Night’s Saber is attending the prom in a suit jacket and button-down shirt sans pants, and Rin Tohsaka is by her side stealing the show with an eye-catching maid uniform. Gintoki Sakatai is also in attendance wearing a very stylish white kimono, showing off far more swagger than that asshole jock Brad could ever pull off, and he could totally beat up Brad too.

Of course, the eye of the ball is this year’s celebrity pairing, Gavin and his new girlfriend, Kosaki Onodera. Gavin has been heard flattering Onodera with compliments about what a nice and innocent girl she is, unlike that slut Charlotte who probably only decided to go to prom with Jackson because his daddy’s rich, which is totally how he got into Yale when he’d normally go to community college along with Gavin.

Oh, and who’s this appearing on the basement carpet? Why it’s Gavin’s mother, sporting a horrified look on her face as she sees Gavin’s half dressed state and… oh, it appears our reporters are being escorted out. Well, that about wraps up our coverage of tonight’s party. But don’t worry, prom season isn’t over yet, and we’ll be here to bring you live coverage of every high school anime fan’s descent into self-pity that goes along with it!

About the author

Bob_Squob is neither a Bob nor a Squob, but they’re both common enough names to form an alias. After roaming the earth for 10,000 years with no purpose, he came upon Anime Maru, and thought to himself, “It is good. I will make my home here.” He currently resides in the darkness for fear that his taste in anime will be discovered and exploited as a weakness. Twitter: @Bob_Squob