Increasing Calls For Demilitarization Of Cosplay

Militarization

WASHINGTON – Members of Congress from both sides of the aisle today called to reexamine current policies due to the increasing militarization of cosplay at anime conventions.

“Cosplay at conventions has always had some military aspect to it,” said Congresswoman Ann Wagner (R-MO), “but things have gotten out of hand. If in previous years you would see the occasional gun or rifle, now cosplayers carry around entire arsenals of high-powered weapons that dominate the convention spaces.”

“At Otakon I actually saw KanColle cosplayers with multiple cannon and large caliber ordinance. One was even riding around on a torpedo!” said Congressman Elijah Cummings (D-MD), who represents Maryland’s 7th district, where Otakon takes place. “I miss the old days where the biggest gun you’d see was a Yoko Littner sniper rifle. Now it is swarms of cosplayers in full tactical gear and armed to the teeth at every turn.”

In response, the Cosplayers Association of America released a press statement which read: “The increasing threat from Abyss fleets, demon hordes, alien mecha, and other such sources has forced cosplayers to adapt to these new forms of warfare. Consequently, their own arsenals have grown formidable. If Congress is concerned about this phenomenon, it best recommend that the President to act to neutralize these forces of evil so that individual cosplayers don’t have to.”

About the author

Based in a one man space station in geosynchronous orbit over Japan, Neontaster is a graduate of Hard Knocks Gakuen with a masters degree in Moeology. He usually has no idea what the hell he is talking about, but is marginally competent at faking it. You can pelt him with rotten digital vegetables on twitter @neontaster